The ongoing saga between mom Candy Spelling and daughter Tori Spelling just keeps going. The latest? Even though Tori invited Candy to her daughter Stella’s first birthday party, Candy bailed at the last minute and decided not to come. Why? Well, because the birthday party was reportedly being filmed for Tori and Dean’s reality show, “Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood”.

But here’s the thing. Different sources are saying that Candy knew ahead of time that the party would be filmed, and that she was reassured, repeatedly, that she would not be on camera whatsoever. So who knows, really…the drama between these two is hard to watch and I wish they would just solve their differences. Life is too short. Plus, my Spidey sense tells me that Miss Tori is the one causing all these issues; like she is going to use this in the show of her kid’s birthday party, crying her eyes out about how her awful mommy has ruined her life, boo hoo hoo. Whatever! If I was Candy, I’d have moved heaven and earth to see my grandkids, even if I had to smack Tori around a bit. Shoot, it could even improve her looks, who knows?

Here’s William Shatner talking about George Takei not inviting him to his wedding; apparently there’s been some bad blood between the two of them for a very long time. Watch:

Here’s what he had to say:

The whole thing makes me feel badly, poor man. There is such a sickness there. It’s so patently obvious that there is a psychosis there. I don’t know what his original thing about me was. I have no idea.

‘I didn’t read his book that was printed many years ago, but apparently I didn’t let somebody have a close-up. I literally don’t know him.

‘I didn’t know him very well on the series. He would come in for a day or two, as evidenced by the part he played. Then on the movies, there occasionally. I didn’t know the man.

‘But he has continued to speak badly about me for all these years. Obviously, hiding his homosexuality - talk about festering and not living the truth of your life and feeling badly about yourself - and being fearful somebody would find out about this terrible, terrible secret, so he thought.

‘Finally at the age of, I think, 70, he decides to come out of the closet and say, “I’m gay.”

‘Like, who cares? Be gay. Don’t be gay. That’s up to you George.’…

‘You would think he had this epiphany and say - because he and I don’t have many years left in this world - “I wish him well. I’m so happy that I wish him well.”

‘But instead what he does is he makes this big deal about not inviting me to his wedding.

‘If I was such a terrible force in his life - even some 40-odd years later, because I’ve not seen him - that I effect his marriage where he has to isolate it, what kind of sickness is going on in the man?

Why would he go out of his way to denegrate me? It’s sad that the man can’t find enough peace in his life to either say “Be positive” and say “I forgive him, whatever those hurts were”, or to shut up about it.

‘It’s sad. I feel nothing but pity for him.’

MeeYOW! Catfight alert! Get some popcorn!

In a recent interview with Jessica Simpson, she mentioned how much she just LURVES her new boyfriend Tony Romo (Carrie’s ex) and how she told him that he was “the love of my life” (for the next couple weeks, anyway). She also said that she knows that Carrie Underwood said that she gets phone calls from Tony - but that she also - get this - checks his phone logs to see who he calls and gets calls from. Uh, hello? Does this give anyone else a Fatal Attraction vibe? Hide the rabbit!

Anyway, this is what Carrie had to say:

“She finds Jessica’s love of putting her life on display pretty desperate,” a pal of the “Before He Cheats” singer tells OK!. “She laughed at the People cover, because it’s the same one Jess did about John Mayer — same smile, same look, except she’s a little fatter.”

- source

LOL! Okay, let’s just get it over with: put these two in a couple of bikinis and a wrestling ring filled with mud. It’s inevitable anyway.

Just another day for the Crazy Crackhead!

Amy Winehouse was stumbling drunk and/or stoned down the street, as she is known to do, and some fan reached out to her, maybe to get some of her amazingly wonderful aura, touch a star, or maybe snatch up some of the crack crumbs on her shoulder. Who knows. Anyway, Amy smacked the living daylights out of this poor lady and called her a few choice names to boot.

Now, personally, if someone tried to touch me on the street, I would have most likely thrown them over my shoulder, Jackie Chan style. Because I can do that. Amy needs to learn some Chuck Norris moves so she can protect against these possible crack thieves next time!

Image details: An Evening With "Two And A Half Men" - Arrivals served by picapp.com

Yikes! Denise Richards has filed an emergency order restricting Charlie’s access to their kids, citing “there’s a serious issue in Charlie’s home that could have an adverse impact on the kids. The issue, we’re told, is psychological and Denise wants professionals to evaluate things. In the meantime, she doesn’t want her kids hanging around there.” - source

What do you think it is? I’m guessing more with his whole pornography/hooker addiction. What do you think?

Ruh roh, Shaggy! Looks like there’s trouble in paradise already for Charlie Sheen and Brooke Mueller (SHOCKER, I know). Apparently, they had to cut their honeymoon in Costa Rica short because they were fighting so much; Brooke because Charlie doesn’t want any kids, and Charlie because all he wants to do is talk about Denise Richards.

Honestly, does this woman have rocks in her head? Charlie Sheen must be like the most charming person on the planet to keep getting these gorgeous, successful women fall in love with him and then act like idiots. He should be forced to wear a sign that says something like “warning, even though I’m supercute, I’m an asshat” or something like that.

Newscom

Remember yesterday when I told you about those awful voicemails from Charlie Sheen? Well, he’s issued an official apology….kind of. Here it is:

“I deeply apologize by my choice of words to all I have obviously offended; especially to Tony Todd, an African-American, who was my best man at my first two weddings.”
He adds, “And for the record, my children did not show up today for a custodial visit without explanation. So three and one-half years later, the reasons that caused the anger and frustration displayed on that voice mail continue to be manifested on a daily basis.” - source

Honestly, these two are just awful, trashy people. Disgusting. They really do deserve each other!

Image credit Newscom

Oh, man! I’ve been waiting a while for this. Remember way back when Elisabeth and Rosie O’Donnell used to go at it on a daily basis? Like here, or here? Well, Elisabeth is finally talking about their issues, and she did it today on Fox News. Watch this clip in which she talks in-depth about Rosie and their problems on-air together:

Personally, I think Rosie was way, way out of line. I love her, but she was out of line. Elisabeth comes across as very naive, very opinionated, but not very knowlegeable - but even if she isn’t the smartest tack in the bunch, she certainly didn’t deserve all that from Rosie. What do you think?

Good morning, Snarkarinos! Hope you all had a good night’s sleep and are ready to be all peppy and shit. Me, I went on a 3 mile walk this morning and I am FEELING IT. Hopefully it will cancel out the six Girl Scout Samoas I had last night while watching the Oscars.

Anyway, on to the goss! First, obviously the Oscars were last night. Here are some of my favoritest dresses.

Next: Jimmy Kimmel’s response to Sarah Silverman’s “I’m Fu**king Matt Damon.”

I’m Fu**king Ben Affleck!

TONS Of celebrity cameos in this one, including Brad Pitt, Harrison Ford, Robin Williams, and lots more!

Too funny. Josh Groban saying the F bomb?!?!?

Next: Jennifer Garner gets attacked on the red carpet.

Watch out, Jennifer Garner! It’s Gary Busey!

So how much crap did Gary Busey take before showing up at the Oscars in order to act like such an asshat? Here’s what happened: Ryan Seacrest was trying to talk to Jennifer Garner and Laura Linney when Gary Busey lumbered over and started manhandling everyone. Watch:

I’m wondering why Ryan Seacrest didn’t do more to get this obviously drunk or stoned guy off of these poor ladies, personally.

Next: Angelina Jolie is officially pregnant.

Angelina Jolie shows off her pregnant belly

Seriously, how cute is she? Rumor has it that she is pregnant with twins; I think she’s only three or four months along, so seeing how big her tummy is already that’s definitely a possibility. I say good for them - as long as they are keeping their relationship happy, and they’re both fine with this many kids, I don’t have any problem whatsoever with it. - source

Let’s see what else is going on today:

• Beyonce might be helping out Barack Obama
• Britney Spears had an evening out with Jamie Spears
• Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban at the Oscars
• Cate Blanchett is looking huge
• Jon Stewart’s Angelina joke at the Oscars

That’s it for this morning, my lovelies - until this afternoon, I leave you with this:

“Don’t talk back to Darth Vader, he’ll get ya!” OMG, too cute, I WANT A NEW BABY. Ahem. Talk to you later!

Spiderman would like you all to know that yes, he is carrying some extra weight and yes, he’s not up to snuff, and yes, HE IS AWARE that his physique is not what it used to be.

However, that does not stop him from reading his daily dose of gossip from Auntie Snarkypants. Let’s get straight to it, shall we?

First, if you didn’t know, this Sunday is the Oscars, and there is a LOT of preparation going on to make it all special and stuff.

Oscars This Sunday! Fweee!

I have to admit, I don’t watch the Oscars, mostly because I just usually have something else I’m doing. I mean, come on - who has time to sit for three hours straight watching people pat themselves on the back? However, I do enjoy the clothes and the pageantry and the plain old giddiness of it all. How about you? Here’s some of what’s going on to get everything ready:

Celebrity attendees were invited to fill green gift bags full of such gratis goodies as jewelry from Alyse Ziede and Heather Hyde, bottles of Icelandic Glacial H20, desserts from Nothing Bundt Cakes and watches from Curtis and Co.

There were even some goodies for pampered celebrity pooches and kitties, including accessories and clothes from John Paul Pet, Happy Go Lucky Dogs and K9 Duds.

Non-Oscar-nominated reality TV stars such as Tia Carrere (”Dancing with the Stars”), Joanie “Chyna” Laurer (”The Surreal Life”), Jason Whaler (”The Hills”) and Beth Stolarczyk (”Real World/Road Rules Challenge”) also showed up for some free stuff.

- source

Hold up - Chyna is at the Oscar freebie stuff? Why, exactly, would she be there? I’m confused. Do these people realize that this stuff is not for anybody who just wanders in? How cheap and tacky of them, seriously.

Next, Charlie Sheen’s fiance is speaking out about Denise Richards.

Denise Muller is the New Supermom, Apparently

Remember that I told you that Denise Richards is going to put her babies in a frigging reality show, and that she actually had to go to court in order to win this insane decision, because Charlie opposed it (as any sane person would)?

Well, now Brooke Muller (who by the way looks uncannily alike to Denise there), is speaking out on how bad of an idea she and Charlie think this is. I think it’s cute how she’s speaking for Charlie Sheen, like they’re going to be together for more than six months. Very cute. And yet, very pitiful and awkward. - source

Next: Britney Spears’ cousin Ali Sims is in more than her usual state of denial.

She’s Just Having a Hard Time, Yall!

Okay, so you probably know that Ali Sims is Britney Spears’ cousin, and she’s also her on again, off again, assistant. When asked about Britney’s year long dance with insanity, this is what she had to say:

“Everybody just keeps supporting her and rooting for her because everybody kind of goes through weird little patches in their life.”

- source

Exsqueeze me? “Weird little patches?” Oh, lordy. Somebody is really trying to hold on to their cash cow, I think.

Next and last, because there’s nothing going on - I bring you the Worst Music Video EVER. Behold:

Honestly, I kinda liked it, so that tells you something about me. Until tomorrow, friends!!