Bret Michaels, formerly of the 80’s hair band Poison, was for some godforsaken reason on the Tony Awards last night, and he decided to focus on wiggling his tight little buns encased in denim Spankies instead of, oh, I don’t know, A HUGE HUNK OF STAGE COMING DOWN ON HIS HEAD. The rocker broke his nose and got some cuts and scrapes, but don’t worry - his nasty hair weave AND his tookus were just fine. I guess they were doing some kind of misguided ’80’s homage, and Bret Michaels just naturally came to mind? Really? Really, Tony Awards? That’s the best you could come up with? Huh. Anyway, here’s the clip, I suggest watching it more than once, because it gets funnier every time:

KaPOW! Down goes the rocker, just like a little bug! Priceless!

Meryl Streep, one of the greatest actresses ever, is soon going to be in Mamma Mia, a musical based on ABBA songs. Yeah, you heard that right…but wait! Do I have a treat for you! Here’s ABBA themselves singing Mamma Mia:

Tags: mamma mia, meryl streep, abba

2007 is apparently the last year that Celine Dion will make us suffer through her "singing" in Vegas. Thank God for small favors, eh? By the way, in the video below, celine dion is the weirdest dancer EVER.

Tags: celine dion

Well, everyone’s favorite goofy musical is having a contest:

Enter to win a chance to meet the cast of Disney Channel’s hit movie, “High School Musical”Ten winners (plus a parent or guardian) will be randomly selected to spend time with the cast at the WSB-TV studios on Sunday, April 9 from 2:30-3:30pm.Scheduled to appear: Zac Efron (Troy), Vanessa Anne Hudgens (Gabrielle), Ashley Tisdale (Sharpay), Lucas Grabeel (Ryan), Corbin Bleu (Chad), and Monique Coleman (Taylor).Entrants must be age 14 or under. Only one entry per family, please. Winners will be selected on Thursday, April 6 at 5:00 p.m.

Feel like a winner? Click here to enter the contest!

Tags: high school musical

Ohhhhhh, no.

Just, no.

Dirty Dancing: The Classic Story On Stage Premiere (it’s a CLASSIC STORY NOW!!!! WHO KNEW!):

And more of nobody backing Baby into a corner (oh, you know you wanted to see it, don’t deny it):

Tags: dirty dancing

From Yahoo:

“The “Lord of the Rings” musical, touted as the most expensive stage production yet, met mixed reviews on Friday as critics applauded its leaping orcs and menacing dark riders, but got lost in the tangled plots of Middle Earth.

For all the feverish activity at Toronto’s Princess of Wales Theatre, the show based on J.R.R. Tolkien’s epic trilogy drew only one standing ovation in more than three hours, but many in the audience called it breathtaking and spectacular.”

I don’t think there’s gonna be a return engagement, Mr. Frodo. Go back to the abyss! Fall into nothingness that awaits you and your master!