So Lindsay Lohan is doing a LOT of spin control since her big debacle last week with the whole breakup and quick dive into the insanity end of the pool, and like anyone else who needs a lift up she decided to go on the Ellen Show and whine and moan about how difficult her life is, how horrible everyone is to her, and how she’s a talented ACTOR and just needs to PRACTICE HER CRAFT. Here’s the video:

It’s basically a ton of dead silence with Ellen pulling stuff out of Linsay. I laughed out loud when Ellen said something about how she wasn’t talking - well, no kidding! She has nothing going on professionally and her personal life is shot to hell. Of COURSE she doesn’t have anything to talk about!

Ellen DeGeneres!

She revealed she was their choice this week on her show; here’s what she had to say:

I think we should just resign ourselves to the fact that we will not be able to leave this earth without seeing Pam Anderson naked at least once. It’s inevitable, with how many times she decides to take her clothes off in public all the time. For example, on the Ellen DeGeneres show:

Time until Mariah Carey starts talking about her divorce on The Ellen Show? Three months and counting. Here’s Mariah gushing about her new husband Nick Cannon. I wonder if she buys his pimple cream for him, maybe some Axe body spray?

Part 1:

Part 2:

What in the hell do these two even TALK to each other about? They probably have full evenings of playing Mario Kart, watching High School Musical for the 124th time, and prank-calling Tommy Mottola.