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Well, nobody saw THIS one coming. Apparently new husband Nick Cannon has been spending wife Mariah Carey’s money like it’s going out of style, and she’s just looking on indulgently. So far, he’s bought a ton of new cars, test driven a $120,000 Maserati Quattroporte (!), and is basically shopping until he’s dropping.

Honestly, I don’t think Mariah much cares about what this guy is doing. She HAD to have known that she was just a meal ticket for him; I refuse to believe that there’s any real relationship stuff going on there. But I could be wrong. Who knows - maybe they’re having fun being “eternally 12″ together - that would be Mariah’s dream come true!

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I don’t think Mariah Carey has shown us the true extent of her craziness yet. I think we’re just looking at the tip of the iceberg, and her recent wedding to iddy biddy Nick Cannon is going to open a whole new floodgate of the crazy. Like this newest thing, for example.

Seems that Mariah wants to re-wed Nicky Wicky EVERY YEAR (what’s the point of that?) and her wedding re-do will be a $4 million affair, with 14 bridesmaids and over 2000 guests. Geez, do ya think she’s overcompensating for something? Like perhaps the fact that she’s married to someone who probably hasn’t gotten his pubes yet?

Time until Mariah Carey starts talking about her divorce on The Ellen Show? Three months and counting. Here’s Mariah gushing about her new husband Nick Cannon. I wonder if she buys his pimple cream for him, maybe some Axe body spray?

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What in the hell do these two even TALK to each other about? They probably have full evenings of playing Mario Kart, watching High School Musical for the 124th time, and prank-calling Tommy Mottola.